By Dana Miller

It's all about sex, baby. It's all about you and me. On this tale end of Oscar what is it about sex in Hollywood? Bar pick-ups are easy, the Internet is a rockin' and the bath houses are full. The hookers are at the Peninsula Bar and on the patio outside Numbers. But what is up with street sex? Down the road from the Gold Coast or the gay gritty canal of Santa Monica Boulevard drunken hormones clearly rule. Shakey's Pizza billboard is wishing happy birthday and congrats on the orgasm. Now you and I get that, but there are pockets of oddity that even I don't quite understand. Take this director fellow, Lee Tamahori. This husband and father directed Mulholland Falls and the James Bond movie, Die Another Day. He was busted a few weeks ago on Santa Monica Boulevard wearing an off-the-shoulder dress, a long black wig, and full makeup as he propositioned an undercover cop for oral sex. What? Full makeup? Cops say they sometimes see 18 prostitutes on one street corner every night of the week including a ton of cross dressing men. I just don't get it. Did you ever go to the old Queen Mary on Ventura Boulevard or La Cage on La Cienega? It was all about getting drunk having a ball and watching a drag show. But both had a weird undercurrent in the corner. There were these straight guys getting liquored up to gain courage to ask a guy with a dick dressed in woman's clothes for sex. My friend Toby Armstrong used to dress in drag for a hoot. He was a damned pretty gal. But he was always blown away that guys would hit on him. They knew he was a guy but wanted to bed a dude in a dress. I make no real judgment, wish all the best, but I just don't get it. Do you? My friend Kurt Smolen, may he rest in peace, used to borrow my car to apparently cruise. One night he confessed he scoured the city looking for amputees to have sex with and he found them. His deal was sex with one legged guys. How do you know that is your thing? One day on the way through Bakersfield Kurt passed out in a men's room of a Chevron station. They found him six hours later with his leg so twisted they had to amputate it. Talk about full circle. How do men know they like to be whipped, tied-up, peed or pooped on? If it wasn't for Falcon videos back in the day I don't think I would have even known some men like their nipples tweaked. It's tough enough to get a little tail, suck a little dick and call it a night. To deal with panties, kickers, hose, bra, a slip, possibly a girdle and how many appendages you have is all so overwhelming to me.

As I write this I'm off to my godfather's memorial. Otis Chandler ran the L.A. Times for years and at a young age threw it all away to surf, ride motorcycles, and fall in love all over again. He lived a wonderful life and while I'm sorry to see him go, I cherish, envy, and honor his amazing time here.

My boyfriend's Red Carpet '06 has wrapped up. Every year Ryan Black does a week long party where stars get swag for the Oscar celebrations. He threw it at the old Scandia Restaurant on Sunset across from the Key Club. This year he kicked it off with a tribute to an elegant photographer and man, Greg Gorman. Greg is a legendary artist and it was a nice tribute to a deserving gent.

Greg hosted a wonderful party for Elton and the Elton John AIDS Foundation board of directors on Saturday at his studio on Beverly. In all the years I've known Greg, he has always been so damn generous. Saturday was just the latest example.

Oscar night was fun. I stopped by APLA's party at the Abbey. Jim Murphy, Dan Moriarty, and the gang have grown this into a major bash. The crowd was stunning. Cowboy hats and tuxes. We spent most of the evening over at our Elton John AIDS Foundation party in a tent on the grounds of the Pacific Design Center. Producer Virginia Fout pulled off yet another victory for people living with HIV and AIDS. Best new artist Grammy-winner John Legend performed with Elton and a record 3 million bucks was raised. Great crowd, great cause, and the goodie bags each weighed 10 pounds! More and more it's becoming all about the goodie bags. Sad but true. We started this little party 14 years ago for a few hundred folks at Maple Drive. This year there were over 2,000 invited guests. Profitable progress -- ya gotta love that!

Over the weekend I watched a terrific concert on PBS starring Freddie Mercury and Queen. It was filmed back in 1986 at Wembley Arena in London. I first met Freddie back in the late '80s in Montreux, Switzerland. He was charming, sexy, talented, and drunk. He was wickedly funny as well. He hit on everything that moved. Scored most of the time. Watching the concert again renewed my hunch that Freddie -- that voice, that strut -- was probably the greatest rock 'n' roll performer of all time. Freddie died in 1992. Watching Elton and Legend sing the other night got me thinking of what more Freddie would have accomplished if he had lived. I so hate that virus.

The longest running AIDS benefit is returning for its 22nd year this weekend at Cal State University Los Angeles's Luckman Fine Arts Theatre. It's called S.T.A.G.E. and this year it celebrates the work of composers Betty Comden and Adolph Green. It is always a delight and shouldn't be missed. David Galligan always throws together a wonderful event. Sally Struthers, Lorenzo Lamas, Betty Garrett, Bruce Vilanch, and a ton of others take the stage and give it their all. Tickets start at 35 bucks and benefits AIDS Project Los Angeles. Go to stagela.com for details. Then get to the theatre.

Thanks to all who wrote me over the past few weeks about the potential passing of the Boom Boom Room in Laguna. Opinions were all over the place yet one strand ran through all the postings: That back in the day the Boom was a blast. Who knows what the future holds, but hell, we'll always have those memories!

See You Out & About. Contact me at Malibudana@aol.com.